Ep.69 Intuitive? You Are Not Alone
Your Intuition is Calling
Today, I want to talk about the fact that you are not alone. If you’re listening to this, you’re probably intuitive, curious about intuition, or you’re super intuitive but don’t have anybody you can talk to about it.
My Journey to Intuition
I was not intuitive all my life. My professional intuitive skills, where I could read other people, actually came about all of a sudden when I was pregnant with my son. One morning, I woke up flooded by thoughts about other people and answers to their questions. It was uncomfortable, brutal, and didn’t make sense to me. For a long time, I rejected it.
In fact, I thought it was so crazy I went to see a psychologist to see if I was becoming psychotic. Turns out, I was not, which, I don’t know, was it good news or bad news? But it was very difficult when it happened, partially because I was alone.
The Shock of Intuition
Before I was 29, I was just minding my own business. I’d been to college for a long time, first in psychology, then in engineering. I was working as an engineer, I liked my career, and I’d never wondered about intuition.
Waking up suddenly intuitive was very shocking. I think this is pretty common, that there’s some kind of a triggering event where all of a sudden we get information that doesn’t necessarily make sense to our logic, to what we think in everyday life, to what we think is reasonable.
Facing Fear and Isolation
If you had told me when I was 21 that someday I would know things about other people, even if I didn’t know them personally, I would have thought that was crazy. But I’ve been doing intuitive readings for 20 years now, and I can tell you for sure, and so can my clients, that this is possible and it’s helpful.
When I first became highly intuitive, I wanted to help people with this new skill. It was really shocking to me that I got shut down so bad and so quickly. Things would come to me spontaneously before I learned how to control it. I would be talking with someone, and they would say, “I don’t know why this keeps happening,” and then the answer would come to me, and I would say it out loud.
A lot of times, there would be shock on their faces. Some people reacted aggressively, scared, and would say something like, “How can you possibly know that?” As if I had been spying on their lives. There was no way I could have known this information. Maybe that’s why it was so scary for them.
Dealing with Rejection
Some people, realizing that my insights were accurate, tried to respond by shutting it down. They would say, “Wow, this is super weird. You shouldn’t tell anybody about this. They’re going to think you’re weird. I don’t want to be associated with that.” I had friends who stopped talking to me. Two of my close friends stopped talking to me, and I’d been friends with them for a long time.
It was really isolating. It was shocking to me that people close to me were violently opposed to me talking about this. Honestly, as a software engineer, it was hard for me to accept it. For the first few years, I didn’t know how to deal with it. I tried to talk about it a few times, and it didn’t go well. I got reactions of fear and shame from others. That taught me that intuition was shameful and scary.
Coping with Intuition
I suppressed my intuition for a long time. I started to drink wine at night after my son was in bed. My husband was ashamed of me. He didn’t understand this, and he didn’t want to know about it. He didn’t want me to talk about it. My ex-husband, obviously.
I ended up living in a place, in a life, where there was no safe space for me to talk about this. I wanted to talk about this today because if you’re in a similar situation, I want you to know that you’re not alone. Even though we haven’t talked, or we don’t know each other directly, I am aware of you, that you’re out there, and that you may also be feeling lonely and isolated.
Finding My Community
I want you to know that you’re not actually alone. I think it would have made a difference for me 20 years ago to know that. At the time, I thought I was alone. Over the years, I learned to control my outbursts of intuitive information. I learned to talk about it in a way that was less scary for people. I also learned that I should only give intuitive readings when someone asks for it.
All these beautiful learnings helped me on my journey to become peaceful with my intuition. This was a great adventure and self-discovery for me. It would have been a lot easier if I had known that eventually, I would meet other people who are intuitive.
Eventually, I would meet other women who felt comfortable talking about it. Eventually, I would also feel called to talk about my experiences as an intuitive, so your adventure is a little bit less rough, a little bit less like whitewater rafting.
I talk about all the different ways that your intuition is calling you.
Because I want to make sure that you’re comfortable answering that call.
And if you’re still looking for your intuitive community, join me in mine!